Today I wanted to talk about a very common topic in the community.
The topic of using copy paste messages, especially those that aren’t authentic and congruent with who you are.
You could basically call it “Catfish Texting“.
First let me get one thing straight.
Online Dating isn’t about just one component.
It consists of many different pieces, that in the end create the entire puzzle.
There’s the profile, the Mindset, the Text Game, the Date behaviour.
If you’re even missing just one of those pieces, like with a puzzle it will be hard to complete it.
What I’m getting at:
Working on your Text Game without having a good profile or with a horrible Mindset, is like shooting yourself in the foot.
(obviously not just with a water gun
Yes, you might get some success, but it will be significantly less than if you had a great profile to back it up.
Your profile is like your business card, it matters more than anything else.
Only once your profile is on point, it makes sense to focus on the other very important aspects of Online Dating.
When it comes to your mindset, that decides about how you’ll interpret messages you receive from women.
And therefore obviously also how you’ll react to them.
The Date behaviour piece is quite self explanatory, so I don’t think I need to get into this much.
Even if your mindset, profile and texting are great..
if you don’t know how to behave on the Date, the woman will still not want to become a part of your life in any way.
Now having gotten this out of the way, let’s continue.
I witness it all the time in Facebook groups:
Men posting a profile of a woman they matched with, asking other random men what they could say to her.
Then someone tells them what to send to the woman.
Afterwards they’re back showing what she replied and asking what they should say to her now.
There are three main outcomes of this, none of them is positive.
𝗦𝗰𝗲𝗻𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗼 𝟭 – 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸
Let’s imagine that our friend (let’s call him Max) gets help from an experienced guy inside a Facebook group and his lines work.
So Max who’s copy pasting those lines ends up going on a Date with the woman.
However, the woman expects the person she was texting with (basically the person helping him out) to go on the Date.
Now two things happen:
1. The woman will lose interest immediately, because she was expecting to meet a confident, creative and humorous man, but got an introverted, uncreative and boring one.
Don’t get me wrong.
it wouldn’t even have mattered much, if she knew what she was in for, because it would have been her decision.
But now she’ll want to politely end the date or come up with some kind of excuse and ghost him afterwards.
2. Max will blame himself and think that something is wrong with him because the woman lost interest.
He’ll look for the problem internally, instead of the fact he just copy pasted lines someone else gave to him.
Trying to figure out the reason for her loss of interest, resulting in a downward spiral of negative self-talk and focusing on the wrong factor.
And when you think it couldn’t get any worse, both of those points lead to his own and the woman’s time basically having been wasted.
𝗦𝗰𝗲𝗻𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗼 𝟮 – 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗮 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗲
So let’s imagine that Max got lines from a very experienced person and they worked well until mid conversation.
He seemed confident, attractive, dominant and fun.
Now he decides to write something on his own as he thinks he could be himself now or because the guy stopped replying for some reason.
But It’s like the complete opposite.
Max is starting to write boring, rational messages and interview the woman, because he doesn’t know better as he has no real experience.
What happens now, is that the woman will wonder why there’s such an incongruence between his messages.
She’ll think something is wrong, lose interest and focus on other men who have been authentic and congruent throughout the entire conversation.
Again resulting in Max blaming himself (or maybe even initially the lines), which obviously is the completely wrong thing to focus on.
𝗦𝗰𝗲𝗻𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗼 𝟯 – 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸
Max tried out the lines someone gave to him and they didn’t produce the results he expected.
Now he will just blame the lines that didn’t work because it is the most obvious to him.
Instead of considering that there might also still be a lot of room for improvement in his profile or his Mindset.
Maybe he will even blame the woman and say she’s boring, a time waster, attention bitch, just looking for Instagram followers, etc.
I know, it’s always easier to blame others than take full responsibility for your own actions and the resulting outcome.
However, the problem with this is that you shouldn’t blame external things that are outside of your control.
It won’t help you improve, you’ll just temporarily feel better because you found a culprit to whom you can hand over responsibility.
What you should do instead is focus on the factors that you can control and optimize those.
Only once you’ve done everything in your power to improve them, you may consider that the issue might lie somewhere else.
𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗰𝗸 – 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗶𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴
What we do is help men to get a crystal clear idea of how to text with women.
They won’t need us anymore after they finish our program and this is how it should be.
All of you probably know the saying:
“If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime“
It’s the same with Texting in Online Dating.
If you give someone copy paste lines, it won’t be long until he runs out of them and his true personality shines through.
The woman will lose interest immediately, because it’s not congruent and authentic.
Even if the lines would work and he ends up going on a date.
At the latest when the woman realizes that she was talking to a whole different person than the one that is now standing in front of her, she’ll lose interest.
Throughout the entire process there needs to be a red thread where you’re always being your authentic self.
The way your profile is set up > Texting with the woman > How you behave on the date.
Do you really want to depend on random men on the Internet for a lifetime..
Telling you what to write just so you can get dates with women you desire?
I doubt so.
This is where our approach is completely different.
First we’re going to show you tons of our own conversations from different dating apps that resulted in dates.
Explaining you the messages, but what’s more important, the PRINCIPLES behind every message.
Because once you know WHY a message worked, it will be easy for you to come up with a similar one that fits your personality.
You will also receive worksheets with templates that make it even easier to develop your own framework.
Just like in school, because this way it’s faster to internalize the information.
But don’t worry, it doesn’t stop there.
On top, we’re going to analyze your conversations on the weekly calls and in our Dating Superheroes Facebook group.
We’ll tell you exactly why the woman ghosted you, took days to respond, responded in a negative way or whatever the issue with it might be.
To the point where there’s not a single question left on the exact reason your conversation wasn’t successful.
Now here is your chance.
if you also want to be a part of our Superhero family and have us analyze your conversations in detail..
Click the button below to fill out the questionnaire and schedule a free coaching call with me personally.