“I’m fine!!!” she said. Fine, she was not.
Steve looks at her complexed “How could she say she’s fine but be boiling with anger? It makes no sense”.
He scatters his thick logical brain for answers. Inside the mind of Steve *cue thinking cloud “Hmm.. Girl is upset but says she’s not, how do I fix her, what’s she upset about..?”.
He continues to ask Stacey probing questions trying to analyse and figure out why she’s upset; with every question, Stacey grows more and more cold and angry.
Steve just can’t crack the code…
He feels confused, helpless, and now lost in his own emotions. Stacey yells, “I’m done with you!” and storms off.
Situations like this happen to chumps all the time.
There’s probably a poor clueless guy getting slapped and yelled at right as i’m writing this.
Men tend to be more logical, and women have a tendency to be more emotional.
This may equal out in the workplace context, but in terms of dating and relationships, the traits of the masculine and feminine are often drawn out to their extremes.
The actual words women use should never be taken at face value.
One of the many things I stress on about in texting is always looking at the emotional implication behind her messages, not just what she says verbatim.
Now the importance of this is multiplied when interacting with women in person.
For men, our word is our word.
For women, the words are secondary and the emotion being expressed is primary. They’re not technically lying.
It’s just feminine nature and how the feminine communicates.
The age-old saying “Change her mood, not her mind” is actually quite on point.
It can seem quite cold and frustrating to men that even when they try to cheer their women up and fix their problems, she retaliates coldly.
But what they’re missing is a fundamental understanding of what women really crave from men in the first place.
After all, some vibrators out there are higher powered than a whole army of Johnny Sins.
Now, of course, there are many reasons…
But among the biggest is your sense of emotional security and imperturbability.
The feminine is like a sea of changing moods.
The masculine is like the rock the water bounces against.
It’s healing, therapeutic, and freeing for women when a man can stay grounded, present, and open despite her changing mood.
Now, this doesn’t mean you don’t have empathy, but you’re staying in your own reality, staying calm and centred, and allowing her mood to dissolve into this.
Every man within him has the intuition to know how to provide this masculine sense of presence and security in these moments.
And based on that intuition, it could take many shapes and forms, maybe you picking her up and licking her nose or you looking deep into her eyes, being stern with your expression, pinning her down and f*cking her hard.
Now this is in the context of relationships but you may wonder how this applies to Dating…
Well.. I can tell you one thing. “Good conversation” and shared interests do not equal attraction.
That’s a common misconception.
I’ve had so many dates when I had nothing in common with the girl, was a completely different person, talked about non-sensical shit, and ended up in the bedroom 30 minutes later.
Your sub comms, tonality, and ability to express your sexuality in a way she’s comfortable with is 80% of what leads to attraction, the words play some part, of course, but they’re not nearly as crucial as guys think.
So to all the Steves, drop the bullshit, ground yourself in your own reality and realise that your masculine presence and security are a gift.
Cheers,
Sandric